Opinions are like backsides

June 24, 2013 |  by  |  Linkedin Blog

My buddy, human performance guru Professor Damian Hughes, reminded me of the words of former Man. United captain Roy Keane, who once said “Opinions are like backsides. Everyone has one, but you don’t always want to see it.”

Boy with Hat

And so it is in the world of personal development.

There’s a $20 Billion industry telling us how to be more successful.

You would expect to see successful people everywhere you look. But the facts are that 1 in 4 of us will suffer some form of mental illness during the course of our life, and half the world’s wealth is owned by 2% of the population.

The problem with the self help industry is that there’s way too much help and not enough self.

My advice? Don’t get sidetracked by people who aren’t on track.

Avoid those who don’t and surround yourself with those who do.

Because immersing yourself in an expert environment, will exponentially increase your chance of success.

Humour

I was the keynote speaker at a Travel Conference in Dubai last week.

The plane bouncing onto the Dubai runway reminded me of the South African airline, Kulula Airways. As you can see from the following remarks, they don’t take themselves too seriously:

Kulula Airways

Captain Plane

1. On a Kulula flight with a very “senior” flight attendant crew, the pilot said, “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.”

2. On landing, the stewardess said, “Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you’re going to leave anything, please make sure it’s something we’d like to have.”

3. “There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane.”

4. “Thank you for flying Kulula. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.”

5. As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Durban Airport , a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: “Whoa, big fella. WHOA!”

6. From a Kulula employee: “Welcome aboard Kulula 271 to Port Elizabeth . To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsupervised.”

7. Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we’ll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Kulula Airlines.”

8. “Your seats cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments.”

9. Heard on Kulula 255 after a very hard landing in Cape Town : The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, “That was quite a bump and I know what you’re all thinking. Well I’m here to tell you it wasn’t the airline’s fault, it wasn’t the pilot’s fault, it wasn’t the flight attendant’s fault, it was the asphalt.”

10. On a Kulula flight into Cape Town, on a particularly windy day after an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to The Mother City. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what’s left of our airplane to the gate!”

11. Another flight attendant’s comment on a less than perfect landing: “We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal.”

12. After a hard landing everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said to the pilot, “Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?”

“Why, no Ma’am,” said the pilot. “What is it?” The little old lady said,

“Did we land, or were we shot down?”

Sunil Bali

As well as being a recognised authority on personal branding and peak performance, Sunil is a critically acclaimed author and blogger. His corporate experience includes roles as Head of Talent on behalf of Vodafone Group, Santander (UK) and Cable & Wireless Europe. Sunil has also run a multi-million pound recruitment business, and is a Non Executive Director. Sunil’s first degree in Sports Science and Psychology fuelled his passion for the psychology of human achievement and well-being. As well as possessing an MBA, he is a qualified Psychotherapist and Executive Coach. www.sunilbali.com

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